Child Abuse

Are You Dissatisfied With Yourself, Your Relationships or Life in General?

Do you struggle to stay engaged at work, school, home or in your relationships? Do you have trouble trusting others and question your own perceptions, thoughts and feelings? Are you uncomfortable in your own skin?

Distressing emotions may have left you feeling too overwhelmed or self-conscious to pursue emotional or physical intimacy. You may feel increasingly exhausted or isolated, struggling to cope with a constant sense of doubt and uncertainty in your life. Perhaps you worry the people you care about will lie or betray you. Maybe you flinch when someone touches you, expecting to feel pain rather than comfort. 

Alternately, you may experience a sense of numbness that you can’t seem to escape. Perhaps you have tried to understand, but struggle to process emotions in a healthy, empowering way. Or, it may be that you feel safer when numb than when flooded with negative thoughts and feelings. You might worry that if you let yourself feel a little, you won’t be able to shut off the rush of emotions. So, in an attempt to avoid negative feelings and take control, you may withdraw from social interactions and keep yourself from fully committing to meaningful relationships. Unfortunately, this strategy of avoidance can leave you even more isolated and alone.

Do you wish you could learn to value and trust yourself, your judgment and the people around you? 

Childhood Experiences and Relationships Impact Our Behavior as Adults

Many teens and adults live with an ongoing sense of dissatisfaction, but it can be difficult identifying those experiences and relationships that have contributed to how you feel and interact with others throughout your life. Even when individuals are aware that they were the victim of neglect, mistreatment or abuse as a child, they may not make the connection between their experience and how it shaped their patterns of thinking and behavior. For some adult survivors of child abuse, exploring the past feels too painful. Others recognize that their parents did the best they could and worry that reviewing their history will mean placing blame on people they love.
When a child is abused emotionally, verbally, physically or sexually, they learn painful lessons that color their worldview, shaping how they see themselves and others. Their experience has shown them that the world is not a safe place and they will not be protected from harm. Children often believe that they deserved or still deserve to be harmed. Many child abuse victims feel like their suffering was their fault and that it is their responsibility to figure out what behaviors will protect them from others. Unless these negative self-beliefs are healed on an ongoing basis, victims of child abuse and neglect grow into adults with these same distressing, limiting and painful beliefs and fears.

Thankfully, there is hope for healing.

With child abuse counseling at my office in Lafayette, CA, you can find the resources, understanding and support you need to feel secure and empowered in your personal life and relationships.

Child Abuse Counseling Can Help You Heal and Grow

No two people are affected by child abuse in exactly the same way, and every individual has their own unique road to healing. As you learn effective tools and techniques to manage anxiety, depression and fear in your daily life, we will explore your unique history, working to heal the original wounds that brought you to therapy. With the right guidance and support, it is possible to find healing, build relationships and feel close with others.

I take an interactive, collaborative approach to counseling and tailor my approach to your particular challenges and goals. In sessions, I will draw from a variety of theories, including Mindfulness and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) to help you assess and address the triggers and patterns that contribute to your feelings of doubt, uncertainty and insecurity. Rather than looking for fault or placing blame, we will work together to build on your innate strengths. 

You can shift your frame of reference, helping you communicate your experience more clearly and feel more empowered in your interactions with others. As you gain greater awareness of your experience, emotions, wants and needs, you can learn how to process and incorporate painful or unpleasant memories into your life in a healthy way. You can accept that, while you love your parents and know that they did their best raising you, their mistakes or missteps—those times you felt unloved, neglected or abused—have played a role in shaping who you are and how you interact with the world. Together, we will develop personalized techniques to help you feel calmer and more secure in the present.

I have been working with survivors in my private practice for over 25 years, as well as teaching other mental health professionals how they can better support those who have faced child abuse. I have had the honor of sharing in my clients’ exciting, painful and beautiful journeys of healing, and I have seen how effective child abuse therapy can be in providing the tools and support you need to put your life together. Your life is not defined by a history of verbal, physical or emotional abuse. There is great hope for relief from the ongoing cycle of hurt, resentment, anger, anxiety or discomfort.

But, you may still have questions or concerns about counseling for child abuse survivors…

I’m not sure therapy is right for me—I’m not crazy…

While therapy can help individuals dealing with more serious mental health challenges, most of the people who seek counseling are just like you. They are overwhelmed by doubt and pain and are searching for the resources, skills and support they need to find relief. My goal isn’t to “cure” or “fix” you, but to offer you the guidance and tools you need to realize meaningful healing and growth.

I’m worried bringing up past memories will be too painful and I’ll end up feeling even worse.

We all experience hurt, and it can sometimes feel like avoiding the pain is the only way to survive. But, like a broken bone, we need to understand and address the cause of the pain before we can realize meaningful, lasting relief and recovery. I provide a safe space and compassionate support, helping you explore and process your experience so you can feel more secure and empowered.

My parents did the best they could—I don’t want to blame them.

Our goal during sessions is not to blame anyone for your current challenges and distress, but to gain clarity about your history, putting it in perspective. When you recognize how childhood relationships and experiences helped shape how you engage with the world, you can take steps to move forward rather than staying stuck in the old wounds.

You Can Foster Trust and Satisfaction

If you are ready to take control of your thoughts, emotions or behavior and foster a more peaceful, fulfilling life, or if you have additional questions about child abuse counseling at my office in Lafayette, CA, I invite you to contact me at 510-528-4718 to schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation.